It’s a new year so I thought this would be an awesome time to discuss something that kind of goes along with my resolutions/expectations. As I am growing individually, I am starting to take notice of my own habits. When I say habits, I don’t mean the little things like leaving the kitchen cabinets open or twirling my hair when I’m nervous (neither of which I do), I mean bigger habits; habits that I think have a bigger effect on me.
I have a habit of living in an imaginary world that I’ve create in my head. This may sound weird at first, but hear me out.
DISCLAIMER: The following examples are to illustrate that I have a habit of setting “unrealistic”/far out expectations that hardly ever align with my reality.
My most recent example of this is my company’s holiday party. I will say that the hype was not all my fault. I don’t get to “doll up” as often as I would like to, so when the buzz started going around about the holiday party, I was super excited to get dressed up and attend. The theme was “modern-vintage” and it was being held at a venue that was new to the city and the company. All of my coworkers asked if I was going, was I bringing a date, what did I have in mind to wear, etc. I imagined this to be a super fun event. We were experiencing an Indian summer so it was 70 degrees in December, it was going to be great. The scenario that I set up in my head was not quite what I expected. Don’t get me wrong, I had fun getting ready for the party, I looked pretty cute, and the venue was very nice but all the fun and excitement I imagined fell short of my expectations.
Another example, you say? Sure. Ever since not having a Sweet 16, I’ve wanted a birthday party. I wasn’t really upset about not having a Sweet 16, but I attended several of them and thought to myself that I want to have a birthday party for one of my “milestone” birthdays. Needless to say, 18 came around and I had no birthday party. That’s fine, I got over it. I knew 21 was another big one and it wasn’t too far away… Twenty-one came around and followed the same pattern. No birthday party. I even asked for one. I had convinced myself that everyone was saying “no” so I would be extra shocked when I arrived at my surprise birthday party. Wrong. To set the record straight, 21 wasn’t bad, though. I celebrated quietly with my loved ones and I did really enjoy myself. After this, I thought, “okay, 25 has to happen.” I imagined it to be fun, full of friends and family, food, music, balloons (because I love balloons), cake — the whole shebang.
Uh, scratch all that! Turns out my family and friends did throw me a birthday party for my 25th! I always wanted one and I finally, finally, got one! Truth is, I drafted this post to go out after Christmas because I just knew there was nothing in the works for my birthday other than a dinner. What a major change in plans, right?
More on the birthday celebration later this month so stay tuned! Regardless, here is a quote from one of my favorite Youtubers:
“Goals are not always meant to be reached, they are meant to be aimed for.” – Shirley B. Eniang
Have any of you experienced something similar to this? Let’s continue the conversation in the comments section. I’d love to gain some tips or just read about your experiences.